and of course it's Andrew Scott.........
~R
So this blog is mainly about anything I want to post about as well as anything anyone would like to say about anything I post about. This will mainly be geeky stuff and nerdy stuff. Acutally, it will all be geeky and nerdy stuff because there is really nothing else worth while in this world... is there?????
Arse Holes
So... today, this guy dropped by my flat. He was here for one of my flat mates who was doing basically an informal job interview and when they were done, the guy still had some time and I wanted to show the guy some stuff that I had done (it was an art interview.) I wanted some feed back and some tips on what I should work on. I didn't have my portfolio with me so I was just showing him some stuff out of my sketch notebook. The first thing that I noticed was off was that he just grabbed my sketchbook and started flipping through. This is a bit of a no-no in the art world because an artist's sketchbook is like their soul. It's a huge compliment if an artist lets you look in their sketchbook because it's basically their diary but with pictures. Every feeling and event that has shaped that person since they were old enough to pick up a drawing object is in that book (or another one, if they've gone through several.) Now this guy had been an art teacher for 45 years so I was kind of surprised when he just grabbed it and started flipping through with out me telling him if he could or not. He was either completely clueless and hadn't picked up anything over 45 years or he didn't care.
The next thing that irked me was that he told me I had to stop drawing anime. After this huge speech to my friend about how "people in art do the jobs because it makes them happy, not for money" he told me I had to stop drawing anime (completely) because it was childish and I would never get a job i it. He told me it wasn't doing anything for me. Now, I' mainly a cartoonist/ animator and a lot of what I do is anime. It doesn't only help me out there, but it helps me with head placements and stuff for realistic drawings. Basically, anime is what helps me figure out what I'm going to do for an actual drawing. Not to mention, I enjoy doing it! This was what really set me off.
He only complimented me once on a before sketch of a bust I'm doing. He really liked that. He said it was good because it showed I could think all the way around something, not just the face of it.
That was the only thing I got out of him.
Arse.
~R
The next thing that irked me was that he told me I had to stop drawing anime. After this huge speech to my friend about how "people in art do the jobs because it makes them happy, not for money" he told me I had to stop drawing anime (completely) because it was childish and I would never get a job i it. He told me it wasn't doing anything for me. Now, I' mainly a cartoonist/ animator and a lot of what I do is anime. It doesn't only help me out there, but it helps me with head placements and stuff for realistic drawings. Basically, anime is what helps me figure out what I'm going to do for an actual drawing. Not to mention, I enjoy doing it! This was what really set me off.
He only complimented me once on a before sketch of a bust I'm doing. He really liked that. He said it was good because it showed I could think all the way around something, not just the face of it.
That was the only thing I got out of him.
Arse.
~R
Cute Jawnlock
The whole point of these are just to make you smile and fangirl.
It gets worse.
FINGER PAINTING!!!!!!!!!!!!
I admite these aren't the cutest they could possibly be but still.....
~R
What Does The Fox Say // Percussion
So I've decided that I'm going to write a cool percussion piece to Ylvis's What Does The Fox Say. It's going to be AMAZING!!!!!! I understand if you don't like the song, but the piece is going to be really cool. When you listen to it (eventually) pretend like you haven't even heard it before. Anyways, I just wanted to remind you what it sounded like originally.
~R
~R
Happy Things
This a vid I watch when I need to laugh and right now, with my grandma, it would definitely come in handy.
~R
~R
Grandma Is Just... Ugh....
She's in the hospital. Again. Kidney failure.
So about a week ago, I went with my grandmother to go look at a nursing home for her. She's going to move in (hopefully) with her husband. Now, on this trip, (my granny's about 65 or so) we were being led around the campus by an 85 year old who was always stopping and talking with his buddies, and the other couple that was looking around with us were in their 80s and they both gardened and stuff but there's my grandma being pushed around in a wheel chair because she's so unhealthy.
This wouldn't really piss me off if it wasn't her fault. She's been chain smoking since she was about 16 (about a pack or two a day) and she's diabetic but doesn't care about what she eats, and she doesn't exercise whatsoever! Her hips and knees are bad, she was in the hospital about a month ago because of really bad clogged arteries (the ones that took blood to her brain!!!) but she still doesn't care about anything that really obstructs her health!
We've tried to help her and she doesn't want it. Now, in a few years, she's probably going to die. She's probably going to keel over before I get out of college!!!! She's not going to see me get married, or have children, or even have my first real job! She's not going to see anything I do and she won't be around to tell me about anything she ever did! All I'll have are a few paintings that she did a while back!
It scares me how fast it's happening.
~R
So about a week ago, I went with my grandmother to go look at a nursing home for her. She's going to move in (hopefully) with her husband. Now, on this trip, (my granny's about 65 or so) we were being led around the campus by an 85 year old who was always stopping and talking with his buddies, and the other couple that was looking around with us were in their 80s and they both gardened and stuff but there's my grandma being pushed around in a wheel chair because she's so unhealthy.
This wouldn't really piss me off if it wasn't her fault. She's been chain smoking since she was about 16 (about a pack or two a day) and she's diabetic but doesn't care about what she eats, and she doesn't exercise whatsoever! Her hips and knees are bad, she was in the hospital about a month ago because of really bad clogged arteries (the ones that took blood to her brain!!!) but she still doesn't care about anything that really obstructs her health!
We've tried to help her and she doesn't want it. Now, in a few years, she's probably going to die. She's probably going to keel over before I get out of college!!!! She's not going to see me get married, or have children, or even have my first real job! She's not going to see anything I do and she won't be around to tell me about anything she ever did! All I'll have are a few paintings that she did a while back!
It scares me how fast it's happening.
~R
Supernatural
The plot line of supernatural:
Dean goes to hell.
Sam ruins everything his brother ever did for him.
Honestly, Sam, shut up.
~R
Dean goes to hell.
Sam ruins everything his brother ever did for him.
Honestly, Sam, shut up.
~R
My Feed Is A TARDIS!!!!!
So it's taken me a while to do it, but I finally did it!!! I've finished editing the blog!!! And then I'm going to see someone else's blog and be like "oh hey that looks really kewl!!!' and then try to change it and it's going to crash and burn again.
It took a long time to edit this time because my internet kept crashing. Damn technology.
~R
It took a long time to edit this time because my internet kept crashing. Damn technology.
~R
Chuck Norris is a Mongol
So my History teacher's name is Mr. Norris. He like the Mongols. Hence the title.
Anyways, my friends and I call him Chuck but I don't think he's ever heard us call him that before. But I walked by him today and said "Hey Chuck!" and he kind of smiled and waved but then realized what I called him and I watched as his face fell into a mixture of confusion and "Gurl, you did NOT just call me dat."
~R
Anyways, my friends and I call him Chuck but I don't think he's ever heard us call him that before. But I walked by him today and said "Hey Chuck!" and he kind of smiled and waved but then realized what I called him and I watched as his face fell into a mixture of confusion and "Gurl, you did NOT just call me dat."
MOOzik and WATERMELON!!!!!!!!!!
So my band is doing a winter concert and I'm part of percussion. I though that I would be out of town for the concert (or really I said that just to get out of actually doing anything) and now, they've "found out" I will be in town and have assigned me parts. Let's see, I have three (technically four) pieces.
1. Patapan (I play bells for this one)
these bells not
these bells.
2. Serengetti Dreams (or spaghetti dreams)
I play really any mallet instrument for this one. We haven't decided yet but I'm pretty sure I'm going on vibes for this one.
3. Deck the Halls
I play Marimba (my favorite) for this one.
So this isn't really a big deal except for the concert is on Saturday and they have yet to give me the music for it!!!!! I don' sound terrible (we did some run throughs yesterday) but I don't particularly sound fine either... IDK we'll have to see....
Also, for the fourth song, there isn't any percussion that plays in it so the band director is making us sing. TRADITIONAL CHRISTMAS SONGS!!! So... this kind of goes against my religion....
The one upside is that, if we don't know the words, the director said we could fake it and sing "watermelon" instead. The entire time we were rehearsing, I didn't hear one verse sung correctly. It was more like
"Hark the Herald angel sings WATERMELON, WATERMELON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Watermelon, watermelon watermelon watermelon!!!!!!"
What was even funnier was the fact that the percussion instructor was singing with us and he was belting our "WATERMELON!!!" louder than the rest of percussion combined. I couldn't sing half the time because I was laughing at him.
It was kind of fun though.
~R
1. Patapan (I play bells for this one)
2. Serengetti Dreams (or spaghetti dreams)
I play really any mallet instrument for this one. We haven't decided yet but I'm pretty sure I'm going on vibes for this one.
3. Deck the Halls
I play Marimba (my favorite) for this one.
Also, for the fourth song, there isn't any percussion that plays in it so the band director is making us sing. TRADITIONAL CHRISTMAS SONGS!!! So... this kind of goes against my religion....
The one upside is that, if we don't know the words, the director said we could fake it and sing "watermelon" instead. The entire time we were rehearsing, I didn't hear one verse sung correctly. It was more like
"Hark the Herald angel sings WATERMELON, WATERMELON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Watermelon, watermelon watermelon watermelon!!!!!!"
What was even funnier was the fact that the percussion instructor was singing with us and he was belting our "WATERMELON!!!" louder than the rest of percussion combined. I couldn't sing half the time because I was laughing at him.
It was kind of fun though.
~R
My Texts/ I'm A Nerd pt. 2
Me: I ATE THE F***ING COMPUTER O MY F***ING GOD I'M GOING TO MURDER IT!!!!!!! I hate it when the computer is better at games than me!!!!!
Friend: SO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE?!?!?
Me: No, what game do you cuss at?
Friend: WoW U?
Me: Chess.
I swear though. It checked me in 3 moves with A PAWN!!! I'M ON THE EASIEST IT GOES, TOO!!!!!
#nerdproblems #artificialintelligenceSUCKSASS
Friend: Did you yell YOU MACHINE!! yet?
Me: No, but I did shout I CAN KILL U C? and quit it.
~R
Friend: SO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE?!?!?
Me: No, what game do you cuss at?
Friend: WoW U?
Me: Chess.
I swear though. It checked me in 3 moves with A PAWN!!! I'M ON THE EASIEST IT GOES, TOO!!!!!
#nerdproblems #artificialintelligenceSUCKSASS
Me: No, but I did shout I CAN KILL U C? and quit it.
~R
Sherlock // Creepy Guy At Work
So I've shared this video before but I felt like it needs more credit instead of one fifth a whole post. Here ya go!!! YOU BETTER LOVE IT!!!!!
It really is hilarious, trust me.
~R
~R
My Ya He
This is one of the best videos in the world!!! I absolutely love the art and how you can kind of tell what the video is about despite the fact that it's in another language. BTW, would anyone care to tell me what language it is???
~R
Matt Smith & David Tennant: Our Doctors' Differences - The Day of the Do...
It was more one difference, really: who does better with the ladies. Of course it's David but then again, he did pretty well with John Barrowman, too.
~R
Shinee // Sherlock
So I've had this song stuck in my head for FOREVER (like... a month...) but it's such a good song! I absolutely love Shinee.
I love the jazziness of it. Also, if you really like the video, do not watch Eat Your Kimchi's review of it. You'll never be able to watch it the same way ever again! But if you do end up watching it, Soy un Dorito.
~R
~R
VIXX
So here's a new and upcoming k-pop band: VIXX!!!! Their name stands for Voice, Visual, Value in Excelsis (don't ask me how.) Anyways, their band is made up of six members:
N: Leader
Age: 24 (korean) 23 (normal)
Blood Type: A
Leo: main vocalist
Age: 24 (korean) 23 (normal)
Blood Type: O
Ken: main vocalist
Age: 22 (korean) 21 (normal)
Blood Type: AB
He's often referred to as the hottest member in the band but I personally think Ravi's the hottest.
Ravi: dancer/ rapper
Age: 21 (korean) 20 (normal)
Blood Type: O
This is Ravi, my personal favorite.
Hongbin: rapper/ vocalist
Age: 21 (korean) 20 (normal)
Blood Type: B
Hyuk: Rapper/ maknae
Age: 19 (korean) 18 (normal)
Blood Type: O
So that's Vixx. Please give them the attention they deserve! They have amazing music, they dance really well, they sing really well, they look great, and they're working hard o promote themselves! They're definitely and up-and-coming k-pop band!
Here's their most popular song right now, Voodoo:
Warning, it's a little graphic and was banned in Korea (though that isn't saying much.)
Am I the only one that would really like to have VIXX under my control?
~R
Yesterday
So yesterday I didn't really do anything. I tried to get my friend out of her early-morning church because she's not Christian but her family makes her go to church anyways so I tried to give her an excuse but her parents weren't buying it so instead I went and volunteered at the lesbian and gay centre in London. I volunteered for the transgender youth meeting which was fun. They're all brilliant kids. Then I went and had lunch with my parents. It was a particularly fun day and I especially enjoyed my time at the centre. So yeah,
~R
~R
Mi mamá pt.2
So yesterday I talked to my mum and we sorted out what happened last night. I told her how my dad and I were doing everything and how she was just sitting there. I told her I understood that she just ha to sit there but that she couldn't drive my dad and I like she was doing. So, I noticed how she got less helpless yesterday. She started trying to drive with the foot that isn't broken and she started getting herself up and getting her own food. Anyways, it was a good compromise and I'm glad I talked to her.
~R
~R
Hilarious Scotsman
So I forget if I shared these videos yet or not but I'll share them now.
Ladies and gentlemen, David Tennant being hilarious.
~R
~R
Sherlockians Unite
So I just wanted to share some of my favorite Sherlock mvs. I wish some of them were longer, but eh. What am I going to do? I don't have the technology for it.
Sail- Moriarty and Sherlock I really like this video because it has so many cool effects that go right along with the music and it's just kind of really awesome. Also, the clips actually match what's going on in the song and it really describes them both perfectly. There's a lot of hard work and skill that went into the making of this idea and it's a really cool thing. I wish it was longer but that's it.
For Your Entertainment- Jim Moriarty So I really like this one for many of the same reasons that I liked the last one. The song just goes with it so perfectly that it's a bit of a shock when you actually listen to the lyrics. Again, this is one of the ones hat I couldn't make and that just blows me away with the skill. I really like the rapid succession of the clips and respect the tedious timing with the clips. I also really enjoyed all of the little humorous bits thrown in there as well.
Don't Mess w/ Me- Moriarty This isn't the video that I wanted to put up (I couldn't find the video that I actually really did like) but this one is good enough. Again, I wish it was longer but whatev. So I put this one up anyways because I really like the song and I think that it goes perfectly with the character. I liked the little quotes put in here. They were put in at really good times but the transition out of them could've been a little better.
That Creepy Guy At Work- Sherlock This one isn't really a mv but it made me laugh all the same. Good clips were used at really good times and that's really all I have to say about it. It was hilarious!!!!
~R
~R
Mi mamá
I feel really guilty.
So as many of you guys should already know, my mom broke her foot the other day (about a week or so ago) and it's been really hard on the family. My dad is stressed out because he's driving her everywhere as well as me everywhere (usually) as well as himself everywhere and then he gets home, does all of these chores and stuff and makes dinner for all of us and gets her whatever she needs and helps her with everything as well as he's on call all the time for his job (seriously, he got called out yesterday morning. SATURDAY!!!) because he's a microscopist (he fixes all of the microscopes) but the people he works with are always breaking it and they don't really like him (they tried to fire him but we fought back and they had to rehire him.) So he's really stressed out and I'm really stressed out because of school, jobs, friends, and just life in general. I have anxiety, depression, and stress so I'm having trouble dealing with those (my case isn't severe enough for medication but it's just bad enough to make me feel really bad all he time.) Also, I take care of her as well. When my dad is out, that pushes me to the prime caretaker and she really has terrible timing when she wants something. If she's hungry, then it's when I'm working on something or right in the middle of playing back an edited part to try and hear it to see it it's good. I'm usually always in the office too so she's calling from another room all the way across the house trying to get my attention. Yesterday, when I was leaving to go to the parade thing, she had me trying to get her all of these things right before I left. I'm darting around the house like "Mum, I'm already fairly late I have to leave RIGHT NOW." but she's like "Just get me my phone." "Just get me some crackers." What she usually asks for is food and they're fairly simple things but they're usually things I didn't think they had! She'd ask for some almond bar or something and I'm like "Okay, where's that?" And if I refuse to get her something she gets mad at me. She's a little over wight and takes her wight very self-conciously and so when I tell her I'm not going to get her some bit of food when I had just gotten up a little while earlier to get her something, she responds with "You're my son. It's not your job to tell me what to eat."
Anyways, I don't know why I get so annoyed every time she asks me to help, I just do. I get that way when anyone asks me to do anything. If it's a chore or something like "go clean the bathroom" it's like "What, because I wasn't doing anything important? Why don't you go clean the bathroom?" I know that she can't do anything right now because she can't walk, but it doesn't stop me from getting pissed off.
So last night, she blew up at my dad and I. It started off with him doing the normal "I don't want to socialize right now, thank you." and turning to his lap top (I was already on mine writing a blog post) and she got mad at him because he ALWAYS does it. In my family, we don't just come home and start having conversations with each other. We talk and tell about how our day went, but after that, we really don't speak to any body. So she got mad at him and he gave what she though was a rude answer, and she blew up even more. She told him that he was being an arsehole and he was teaching me how to be an arsehole as well. I kind of took offense to that because I was just all of a sudden dragged into this conversation that I wasn't a part of before. Then she started going off on both of us about how we don't help her enough, especially me. Now, my dad helps a ton. Right now, he's the one tying down the family. My mum doesn't do anything lately because she can't. She still goes to work and stuff but my dad has to pick her up and drop her off as well as get a wheelchair and wheel her around wherever she needs to go. I can understand why she would be a little mad at me. I am extremely lazy and I really don't like to get up to go do anything unless it's of my own free will. Hell, I barely get up to go pee. So I can understand why she would be mad at me because I really don't do much for her. Still, I have my own problems to deal with and my own work to do. I thought I was a really good kid. I don't refuse to help at all, I get really good grades, I'm into sports, clubs, and extracurricular activities. I'm like a college's dream. However, I don't help out at home a lot. I'm usually really tired and just can't be bothered to move. That still doesn't mean that I'm not a good person. I don't smoke, or drink, I haven't murdered anyone, I try to keep other people in mind when I make my decisions, I try to ask the least of m parents, and I really REALLY do try to help out around the house.
So I feel terrible. I wish I had that feeling that I did when I realized what a good kid I am. I need some more of that "I'm definitely worth-while" feeling right now. I know this is very dramatic, but it needs to be said. I have never thought of suicide. I mean, I have (every one has) but only in a curious way where I would never actually do it. My goal for my life for the past six years has been trying to keep myself away from that pi but after what my mom said, I felt my depression increase by so much. I felt that pit grow closer. I'm not at that point yet but I'm getting there and it's scaring me.
I feel like I can't do anything for my mother. I'm too caught up in myself to help her and it makes me feel like I am a terrible person even though I know I'm not.
Being gay also increases my depression. I don't hate the fact that I'm gay (I actually really embrace the gay community and like all of the friends I've made in it over the years) but it's how people treat me. I feel like everyone thinks I'm less of a human being because of how I'm treated. I'm called a fag by people who don't know me whatsoever and I'm condemned to hell for my sexuality, even though I haven't even had a relationship with a guy or anything yet.
Also, last night, after my mum had finished blowing up at me an my dad, she stormed out (as best she could by rolling on an office chair) and went to go sulk in her room. My dad went back there a while later to see if she wanted to talk (I think he was waiting for himself to calm down) but she just turned him away and he went right back out to the living room.
I'm at my own house now (I got home around 1) and I feel really emotionally drained. My dad and I just sat in silence together for about the last hour before I got up, said good bye, and left. I never went back to talk to my mom except for shout a quick good night. I was too afraid. I was too afraid that I would break down and cry and that I would get even more depressed than I am already.
I remember in my high school we had his day called unity day where all of the sophmores got together and played some team building games and poured out all of our feelings to each other. What was really memorable was when we played this one line game. I was set up like this:
We were all on one side of the line. Then they would ask us a question like "Cross the line if you've ever been homeless." It was the most heart breaking experience to watch everybody cross the line. One of the most memorable questions was "Cross the line if you feel like you've ever been a disappointment to your parents." Every one crossed on that one. All six hundred student as well as 30 staff members crossed that line. If I hadn't crossed that line back then, I definitely would've crossed it now.
I know, I'm being depressing and dramatic but I've felt like a bit of a failure to my parents for a while. I never help around their house, I never did when I was a child and still living with them, and I always take them for granted. My mum is very supportive. She's more supportive than anyone I know except for maybe my dad and one of my best friends, Sherly. She's always taking me to things, threatening to beat people up when I was bullied in school, she can't wait for me to have a boyfriend and a relationship and a family and a future. She gave me an un-influenced point of view. She let me choose my path and everything but she feels like I haven't done anything for her and I really haven't. I need to spend more time with her and love her more than I do.
Anyways, I'm really depressed now and emotionally drained again so I'm going to go sleep. Sorry this was so long I just needed to get it off m chest. I'll tell you all more about the line game later.
~R
So as many of you guys should already know, my mom broke her foot the other day (about a week or so ago) and it's been really hard on the family. My dad is stressed out because he's driving her everywhere as well as me everywhere (usually) as well as himself everywhere and then he gets home, does all of these chores and stuff and makes dinner for all of us and gets her whatever she needs and helps her with everything as well as he's on call all the time for his job (seriously, he got called out yesterday morning. SATURDAY!!!) because he's a microscopist (he fixes all of the microscopes) but the people he works with are always breaking it and they don't really like him (they tried to fire him but we fought back and they had to rehire him.) So he's really stressed out and I'm really stressed out because of school, jobs, friends, and just life in general. I have anxiety, depression, and stress so I'm having trouble dealing with those (my case isn't severe enough for medication but it's just bad enough to make me feel really bad all he time.) Also, I take care of her as well. When my dad is out, that pushes me to the prime caretaker and she really has terrible timing when she wants something. If she's hungry, then it's when I'm working on something or right in the middle of playing back an edited part to try and hear it to see it it's good. I'm usually always in the office too so she's calling from another room all the way across the house trying to get my attention. Yesterday, when I was leaving to go to the parade thing, she had me trying to get her all of these things right before I left. I'm darting around the house like "Mum, I'm already fairly late I have to leave RIGHT NOW." but she's like "Just get me my phone." "Just get me some crackers." What she usually asks for is food and they're fairly simple things but they're usually things I didn't think they had! She'd ask for some almond bar or something and I'm like "Okay, where's that?" And if I refuse to get her something she gets mad at me. She's a little over wight and takes her wight very self-conciously and so when I tell her I'm not going to get her some bit of food when I had just gotten up a little while earlier to get her something, she responds with "You're my son. It's not your job to tell me what to eat."
Anyways, I don't know why I get so annoyed every time she asks me to help, I just do. I get that way when anyone asks me to do anything. If it's a chore or something like "go clean the bathroom" it's like "What, because I wasn't doing anything important? Why don't you go clean the bathroom?" I know that she can't do anything right now because she can't walk, but it doesn't stop me from getting pissed off.
So last night, she blew up at my dad and I. It started off with him doing the normal "I don't want to socialize right now, thank you." and turning to his lap top (I was already on mine writing a blog post) and she got mad at him because he ALWAYS does it. In my family, we don't just come home and start having conversations with each other. We talk and tell about how our day went, but after that, we really don't speak to any body. So she got mad at him and he gave what she though was a rude answer, and she blew up even more. She told him that he was being an arsehole and he was teaching me how to be an arsehole as well. I kind of took offense to that because I was just all of a sudden dragged into this conversation that I wasn't a part of before. Then she started going off on both of us about how we don't help her enough, especially me. Now, my dad helps a ton. Right now, he's the one tying down the family. My mum doesn't do anything lately because she can't. She still goes to work and stuff but my dad has to pick her up and drop her off as well as get a wheelchair and wheel her around wherever she needs to go. I can understand why she would be a little mad at me. I am extremely lazy and I really don't like to get up to go do anything unless it's of my own free will. Hell, I barely get up to go pee. So I can understand why she would be mad at me because I really don't do much for her. Still, I have my own problems to deal with and my own work to do. I thought I was a really good kid. I don't refuse to help at all, I get really good grades, I'm into sports, clubs, and extracurricular activities. I'm like a college's dream. However, I don't help out at home a lot. I'm usually really tired and just can't be bothered to move. That still doesn't mean that I'm not a good person. I don't smoke, or drink, I haven't murdered anyone, I try to keep other people in mind when I make my decisions, I try to ask the least of m parents, and I really REALLY do try to help out around the house.
So I feel terrible. I wish I had that feeling that I did when I realized what a good kid I am. I need some more of that "I'm definitely worth-while" feeling right now. I know this is very dramatic, but it needs to be said. I have never thought of suicide. I mean, I have (every one has) but only in a curious way where I would never actually do it. My goal for my life for the past six years has been trying to keep myself away from that pi but after what my mom said, I felt my depression increase by so much. I felt that pit grow closer. I'm not at that point yet but I'm getting there and it's scaring me.
I feel like I can't do anything for my mother. I'm too caught up in myself to help her and it makes me feel like I am a terrible person even though I know I'm not.
Being gay also increases my depression. I don't hate the fact that I'm gay (I actually really embrace the gay community and like all of the friends I've made in it over the years) but it's how people treat me. I feel like everyone thinks I'm less of a human being because of how I'm treated. I'm called a fag by people who don't know me whatsoever and I'm condemned to hell for my sexuality, even though I haven't even had a relationship with a guy or anything yet.
Also, last night, after my mum had finished blowing up at me an my dad, she stormed out (as best she could by rolling on an office chair) and went to go sulk in her room. My dad went back there a while later to see if she wanted to talk (I think he was waiting for himself to calm down) but she just turned him away and he went right back out to the living room.
I'm at my own house now (I got home around 1) and I feel really emotionally drained. My dad and I just sat in silence together for about the last hour before I got up, said good bye, and left. I never went back to talk to my mom except for shout a quick good night. I was too afraid. I was too afraid that I would break down and cry and that I would get even more depressed than I am already.
I remember in my high school we had his day called unity day where all of the sophmores got together and played some team building games and poured out all of our feelings to each other. What was really memorable was when we played this one line game. I was set up like this:
I know, I'm being depressing and dramatic but I've felt like a bit of a failure to my parents for a while. I never help around their house, I never did when I was a child and still living with them, and I always take them for granted. My mum is very supportive. She's more supportive than anyone I know except for maybe my dad and one of my best friends, Sherly. She's always taking me to things, threatening to beat people up when I was bullied in school, she can't wait for me to have a boyfriend and a relationship and a family and a future. She gave me an un-influenced point of view. She let me choose my path and everything but she feels like I haven't done anything for her and I really haven't. I need to spend more time with her and love her more than I do.
Anyways, I'm really depressed now and emotionally drained again so I'm going to go sleep. Sorry this was so long I just needed to get it off m chest. I'll tell you all more about the line game later.
~R
Snowy Parade
So I did promise that I would tell you guys about a parade I was doing today. It got cancelled (thankfully) because of cold weather and a lot of rain (possibly snow.) Anyways, my colour guard team and band decided that we weren't going to do it today because none of us feel like getting sick and we have concert/ winter guard/ drum line season to start practicing for.
So we don't really do anything for a parade but play music and do a little bit of flag work. Therefore, there's not really anything for me to explain to you guys.
So my car broke down right before I was going to the meeting place and I'm too bloody poor to pay for any public transport right now so I decided I'd ride my bike (after all of my friends told me they couldn't take me) but when I got on, the back tire popped and I didn't have time to fix it so I just started walking. Soon, it started to rain and I got drenched and sad. By the time I got here, I was drenched and they had all decided that we weren't going to do it. Then, I hitched a ride back to my house w/ one of my friends. I'm happy that we're not doing it but getting there was terrible.
Oh well.
~R
So we don't really do anything for a parade but play music and do a little bit of flag work. Therefore, there's not really anything for me to explain to you guys.
So my car broke down right before I was going to the meeting place and I'm too bloody poor to pay for any public transport right now so I decided I'd ride my bike (after all of my friends told me they couldn't take me) but when I got on, the back tire popped and I didn't have time to fix it so I just started walking. Soon, it started to rain and I got drenched and sad. By the time I got here, I was drenched and they had all decided that we weren't going to do it. Then, I hitched a ride back to my house w/ one of my friends. I'm happy that we're not doing it but getting there was terrible.
Oh well.
~R
To make it up
To make it up to your guys for not having posted anything in a while, have a cute JohnLock.
~R
~R
Sorry
So I'm sorry I haven't been posting anything lately. I've had a LOT of stuff to do. For instance (just today) I've already done quite a few hours of work and then after work I'm working in a parade. I'm doing color guard.
this kind
Anyways, I've been doing a lot lately. I'll fill you in later on the parade (it all depends if it happens o not. I don't know what's going on.)
I have to go get ready now because it's going to take me an hour to get to the meet-p place. See you all later!!!
~R
this kindI have to go get ready now because it's going to take me an hour to get to the meet-p place. See you all later!!!
~R
A few hours later...
So a few hours after my last post and I haven't moved forward at all. There's been a lot less crashing which I am very happy with (I took my mate's laptop) but their laptop is a lot more high tech than mine and therefor I don't know how to work the applications like I know how to work the ones on my laptop. It's been taking a little while longer than I had hoped but mine wouldn't have worked whatsoever.
So far I've gotten all of the videos imported into the program and tried to figure out how to import videos but it didn't really work.. I'll have to figure out how to do that later. Anyways, there is a lot more stuff to edit than I thought there was and the person we recorded, when he was talking, he usually always had his head down. The good part about taping twice means that for all of the times his head was down, there was another time when his head was up. Now, I have to go through and cut out all of the head-down stuff and that's taking a while. Not to mention, the program is a little buggy and as a new user of a new version (it might as well just be a whole new program) it's basically sucking. If my laptop actually worked, This probably would've been done a while ago. Or if I had already known how to work this one.
My cats, Rukia and Sebastian, have decided they would join me for the night.
It's now 6 am, I haven't slept at all, and I have to go to work. I would appreciate getting ready some what slowly so I'm going to have to go now. Good bye and good morning!!!!
~R
So far I've gotten all of the videos imported into the program and tried to figure out how to import videos but it didn't really work.. I'll have to figure out how to do that later. Anyways, there is a lot more stuff to edit than I thought there was and the person we recorded, when he was talking, he usually always had his head down. The good part about taping twice means that for all of the times his head was down, there was another time when his head was up. Now, I have to go through and cut out all of the head-down stuff and that's taking a while. Not to mention, the program is a little buggy and as a new user of a new version (it might as well just be a whole new program) it's basically sucking. If my laptop actually worked, This probably would've been done a while ago. Or if I had already known how to work this one.
It's now 6 am, I haven't slept at all, and I have to go to work. I would appreciate getting ready some what slowly so I'm going to have to go now. Good bye and good morning!!!!
~R
Y u no technlology?
So I've been trying to use the webcam to record a quick little vlog for you guys but it's not working... even when I take my room mate's laptop. Does technology just not like me?
~R
~R
Stress & Ducks. Don't ask how the two go together.
I'm drinking cold water to lower stress and keep me awake but I'm not sure it;s working. I'm super tired and stuff so.... Ugh. I might start to sound a bit Scottish or something. I do that a lot when I get tired. Anyways, I was editing the video and going through all of the clips we had filmed and Dustin, one of the interns, had stared vlogging because he was bored and there wasn't a whole lot to do and in the background you just hear me going "ducksducksducksducksducksducksducksducksducks" because I was looking for pictures of ducks online to put into the video (don't ask why, it'll take too long to explain) and I had totally forgotten about it. But then, at the end of the video, you hear me shout "I'M BETTER THAN YOU!!! I can FLY and my BODY is a BOAT!!" because I had found the above picture and I was coffee-deprived and I wanted to shout something.
So, as it being 4 am and I'm sleep-deprived, I started laughing and may have possibly woken one of my room-mates up. Maybe I'll introduce them to you later. They're a lot of fun. When they're not stealing your food.
~R
My Lesbian Friend's Dad
So I have a friend... who's a lesbian... Anyways, I went over to her house once because we wanted to make rainbow cake. Her dad is someone who's very religious and stuff and threatens to do things to people. Anyways, we were also working on a new fashion line together and were in the process of making a dress for her. Then we decided to make rainbow cake. Anyways, for anyone who doesn't know me, I'm gay. The particular friend I'm talking about actually calls me Twinky... because I'm a Twink... it's basically a small, blonde, gay guy.
Anyways, her dad doesn't like gays and was threatening to pull her out of high school even because there were too many gays at our high school.
Anyways, we were home alone at her house when her parents walk in the door after grocery shopping. Now, her mom LOVES me. She thinks there absolutely could not be a better person for her daughter to hang out with. I was sitting at the table eating the rainbow cake we had just made and her dad stares me in the eye and says "Daughter, go get my gun." Honestly, I almost fell out of the chair because her dad is really big and scary and could easily kill me and I've never had anything like that said to me before. Then after having my balls threatened to be chopped off and tons of other things if I ever even hugged his daughter, I escaped to her room (after finishing my cake, of course.) Then he kind of stood outside her door as we proceeded to work on our stuff.
The next day, at school, she came up to me and told me that her dad told her to go date me because he reminded me of a character from Duck Dynasty.
I found this hilarious because I'm gay and she's a lesbian. It's not happening.
~R
Anyways, her dad doesn't like gays and was threatening to pull her out of high school even because there were too many gays at our high school.
Anyways, we were home alone at her house when her parents walk in the door after grocery shopping. Now, her mom LOVES me. She thinks there absolutely could not be a better person for her daughter to hang out with. I was sitting at the table eating the rainbow cake we had just made and her dad stares me in the eye and says "Daughter, go get my gun." Honestly, I almost fell out of the chair because her dad is really big and scary and could easily kill me and I've never had anything like that said to me before. Then after having my balls threatened to be chopped off and tons of other things if I ever even hugged his daughter, I escaped to her room (after finishing my cake, of course.) Then he kind of stood outside her door as we proceeded to work on our stuff.
The next day, at school, she came up to me and told me that her dad told her to go date me because he reminded me of a character from Duck Dynasty.
I found this hilarious because I'm gay and she's a lesbian. It's not happening.
~R
I'm a Nerd.
I realized today what a good person I am. I'm also guilt-tripping myself into things like "Why aren't I more dedicated?" or "Why aren't I looking at it from this person's point of view?" But I realized today what a good person I really am when I we had some free time in Spanish class and instead of hiding my ipod under the tables like everyone else, I pulled out my nook and started reading Shakespeare and then again when I saw how every guy on campus was wearing one of the black and white shirts with the scantily dressed woman on i but I was wearing a sweater over a dress shirt.
I never have to be guilty again!!!! I'm a good person!!!
Sure I have m flaws, but oh well. I'm one of the few people a girl could bring home and their dad be like "Yeah, I like you. Come over any time."
Which has actually happened... but that deserves a post all it's own.
~R
I never have to be guilty again!!!! I'm a good person!!!
Sure I have m flaws, but oh well. I'm one of the few people a girl could bring home and their dad be like "Yeah, I like you. Come over any time."
Which has actually happened... but that deserves a post all it's own.
~R
Jeff the Killer
So my parents and I were watching the latest Grimm and the title poem which told children to go to sleep reminded me of Jeff the Killer so I told my parents the story and showed them this picture. (putting it in as a link so that you don't have it's eyes boring into your soul as you read my blog)
Jeff the Killer pic My mom was like "That's creepy. I've seen that picture before." And when I showed my dad, he just kind of looked at it and then he farted.
I guess that's a good response...
~R
Jeff the Killer pic My mom was like "That's creepy. I've seen that picture before." And when I showed my dad, he just kind of looked at it and then he farted.
I guess that's a good response...
~R
Depressing Lllamas
So I posted some bloody depressing stuff yesterday (needless to say, I didn't had the best day) and just thought that I should post something to cheer everyone up after reading all my other posts.
Have fun with a distant relative of mine (I still can't get over that!!!!! XD)
~R
~R
Even Moar Family
So on top of yesterday with all of the awkward family, my mum has broken her foot. She was going around and fussing about my flat, cleaning it up, when her toe got caught in her pant leg and she tripped and it broke her foot. Now, after taking her to the hospital, I'm back at her and my dad's place, taking care of her every whim. Can I not get a moment to myself? I'm sorry that this has happened to her but she's getting days off at school and she is in minimal pain! I have tons of work to do still and instead I'm making cranberry radish and ham sandwiches for my mum while she sits with her laptop and watches Sherlock.
And of course this blog isn't helping.
I'm starting to think my family deserves their own label.
~R
And of course this blog isn't helping.
I'm starting to think my family deserves their own label.
~R
Moar Family
So my family hunted me down and dragged me out of my room and out to dinner. I REALLY hate these people. I had a little break down on the way there and even cried a bit (reiterating the I really hate these people bit.) I refused to get out of the car when we go to the restaurant and only got out when they were finally seating us. I made awkward conversation with people and really just sat there and ate my burger. At he end, it was a lot of awkward hugs and when I wen to hug my aunt, she even looked at me awkwardly and said "oh okay" before leaning in for a half-hug. Why can't my family either approve of me or get the hell out of my life?!
My mother was the one that came in and dragged me out. Nobody else paid attention to me except her and my dad. I hated everyone there except for them ad my grandma and they hate me back! Why do we have o pretend to like each other?! My mom kept saying "You have to make an effort to get to know them" and I'm like "They've had seventeen years to try to get to know me and they haven't" at which my mom promptly shut up.
I need better family. I'm tired of all of the awkward family visits.
~R
My mother was the one that came in and dragged me out. Nobody else paid attention to me except her and my dad. I hated everyone there except for them ad my grandma and they hate me back! Why do we have o pretend to like each other?! My mom kept saying "You have to make an effort to get to know them" and I'm like "They've had seventeen years to try to get to know me and they haven't" at which my mom promptly shut up.
I need better family. I'm tired of all of the awkward family visits.
~R
Family
So my super-conservative family decided the were going to drop by. They all disapprove of me. None of them like me. There's Brian, my super conservative uncle and Debbie, his even more conservative wife, then there's their sons, less conservative but eh, and their girlfriends, whom I'm just meeting, and their children, a newborn and a slightly older baby. Also my parents and grandmother came down. I don't know why, but they all chose my flat to come to. I just set out plates of cheese and crackers and disappeared into my room. Now I'm on a blog surrounded by my cats because there's no way I'm allowing them to become conservative. By the sound of it, they've all decided they want to go get food. I can't wait until they are out of my flat!!!!
Why am I so awkward around my family?!
Bu the thing is, it's all being hosted at MY house with MY food and I'm the one who's hiding out. I said hi to all of them then made like I was going to go get something and never came out again. I heard them all ask "Where's Roan?" a few times but I haven't heard it in a while. Hopefully they forget about me and leave before I get too hungry.
Having been warned by me, my room mates decided to leave before they could get captured.
Bu the thing is, it's all being hosted at MY house with MY food and I'm the one who's hiding out. I said hi to all of them then made like I was going to go get something and never came out again. I heard them all ask "Where's Roan?" a few times but I haven't heard it in a while. Hopefully they forget about me and leave before I get too hungry.
Having been warned by me, my room mates decided to leave before they could get captured.
In light of it being 6am
So one of my teachers always walks in class like
and I'm all like
And I'm waiting for the day she replies
(Sorry those were all of them that I could find. I know the quote doesn't really go like that but those were the only gifs I could find of it.)
~R
~R
One handed typing!!!
So I've learned how to type one-hande because my cats tend to like to lie on one of my arms and it's slightly annoying but I don't want to move them because they're so cute... I blame you, Sebastian!!!!
~R
~R
Tired
So I've been working non stop for the past three or so hours and I got NOTHING done. All I have is a Mongol hat and Dvid Tennant hair. Still have 30+ pages of notes and a ton of other stuff to do! D: UGH!!!
~R
~R
Stress
So today I'm finally meeting up with the other people from work. I REALLY hope that we can get everything done.
~R
~R
I IZ SCOTTISH
So my friend decided that she would post something about her Irish heritage which got me all "I SHOULD POST SOMETHING ABOUT MY SCOTTISH HERITAGE!!!" which was why there was David Tennant... and BARROWMAN!!!!!!! I was trying to find out if I was in the same clan as them. So yeah. I'm Scottish. I think my great grandfather was the last full Scottish person in the family on my mom's side. On my dad's side, it was also pretty far back. Anyways, I'm English, Irish, and Scottish. What a wonderful combination. If we ever had a family reunion, it'd cause the next World War. I'm also Mannish, Dutch, and German but let's not worry about that right now. I have a ton of fun heritage stories to tell.
Mother:
I have no idea what my Scottish clan is but the lst name I have too work with is Ricketts. I don't know. I have done a ton of research and nothing popped up. Probably because I'm trusting all of my grandma's stories and she has a tendency to forget something that happened five minutes ago. I know I have one (we found the crest and everything) I just don't know which one it is and I'm trying to find it again by myself. I remember i starts with an R though. I'm not sure which R clan though. I think it's Rollo. But I'm not certain.
Father:
My clan on my dad's side is MacLeod. We traced it through the name Lewis which ended when my grandma married my grandpa. Anyways, through that name, we raced it to the MacLeod's.
Guess who's also a MacLeod?
That's right. David Tennant. Who's mom's surname was MacLeod.
No biggy, I'm just, y'know, related to the Doctor.
~R
Mother:
I have no idea what my Scottish clan is but the lst name I have too work with is Ricketts. I don't know. I have done a ton of research and nothing popped up. Probably because I'm trusting all of my grandma's stories and she has a tendency to forget something that happened five minutes ago. I know I have one (we found the crest and everything) I just don't know which one it is and I'm trying to find it again by myself. I remember i starts with an R though. I'm not sure which R clan though. I think it's Rollo. But I'm not certain.
My clan on my dad's side is MacLeod. We traced it through the name Lewis which ended when my grandma married my grandpa. Anyways, through that name, we raced it to the MacLeod's.
No biggy, I'm just, y'know, related to the Doctor.
~R
Wow
So I got off of work today and find that I've had 200+ VIEWS ON MY BLOG TODAY! jUst today. That's almost doubled from yesterday! AND today isn't over yet! Bloody hell what's going on?!?!?!?
~R
~R
Eat Your Kimchi!!!
So EYK is having the EYKmusic awards! You better go vote for U-KISS!!!! Or Shinee... Or B2ST... Or 2PM... Or 2NE1.... Or Girls' Generation... Or anyone else... BUT U-KISS!!!!!
~R
~R
Page Views Can Be Sexy
So I seemed to get about 100+ more page views as soon as I put Benedict Cumberbatch's face one here......
hey gurl
hey gurl
hey gurl
hey ben
mmm...
hey gurl
hey gurlhey gurl
hey ben
mmm...
You're welcome.
~R
3.14Brkfst
Yesterday a work a coworker brought in a GIGANTIC pie and so we all took pie home. Like, a TON of pie. PIE FOR BREAKFAST!!!!!!!!!
~R
~R
Procrastination
So I have a ton of stuff to do and not a lot of time to do it in. Why am I on this blog? YAY PROCRASTINATION!!!!
~R
~R
Life
So... Remember how I said I had that big project for my work due on the 4th? Well, my boss just decided to kick me out of the workplace and so now, when I had previously gotten in contact with 2 of the five other people I work with, I now have to get in contact with them again to chance to meeting place as well as get ahold of the other three. I really hope they check their emails.
It seems like this gif is coming up more and more often in my life...
~R
~R
I IZ ARTIST
So, I'm sure that rarely anybody knew this but I have a job as an animator. Most of my time right now is spent in school but I also spend some time sketching and drawing and things. It's not a very high-paying , high-hours, serious job, but it's a job. At my job, I do more of a collective arts thing. I do video, animation, editing, photography, acting, dance, music (piano, percussion, french horn, etc.), and really anything. The things I do at my job are a lot like what I do at school. Anyways, my point is that I'm an artist and I was going to post some things on this blog that I've done but I haven't one that yet. I have full intention of doing that and making this more of an artsy blog as well. Right now, I don't have any of my work up on the computer but this is another one of the things that I promise to post sometime.
~R
~R
The Mongol-chondria
So, separate from the work I'm doing at my job, I'm also working on another project for school. We have teams doing video, cartooning, costuming, scripting, music, acting, and research. For the project, we're taking an organelle and we're creating a political campaign for it to prove why it is the more needed of the organelles. We got the mitochondria (which we are comparing to a Mongol.) I'll show you some sketches I drew up later. It's coming along pretty awesomely and it's going to be really cool!!!! I can't wait for it to finally all come together. I'll keep you all posted on it as it evolves but right now there really isn't anything much besides some sketches I did.
~R
~R
Interns
So right now I'm working on this huge project with a bunch of "interns." (Interns in this case just applies to people who are under me and have no idea what they are doing. Granted, I'm not high up in my workplace but I'm higher than them and they're super annoying.) It has to be in by Tuesday and all of the people working on it are idiots except for one of my friends, who is the only one (besides me) who isn't an "intern." Anyways, we were given an assignment which I can't really ell you much about but it's one of those things where you have to be absolutely creative in order for you to actually really achieve anything with it. My friend is the head of the whole thing and I'm the head of the animating/ creativeness force for this. I'm in charge of about three people and the entire group is about six people big. There's a lot of stuff to get done and we haven't even really started it. We've been planning and researching and drawing but we haven't started writing and recording yet really. Also, the intern in charge of the contacts LOST THE CONTACTS!!!! We're all on this big break right now but we have to keep working through it in order to get things done. The person in charge of them *ahem* (you know who you are) didn't contact anyone and I finally had to track her down through her sister and then had to help her gather all of the contacts back together again. I personally emailed everyone but NOBODY HAS EMAILED ME BACK YET!!!! It's all really unprofessional of them and there's going to be a big consequence if we can't all pull together and do this. I'm starting to leak my efforts into other departments but I'm afraid it isn't really working. I'm just hoping it all works out. I HATE INTERNS!!!!!!
~R
~R
My Life Today
So basically, I did nothing today but some work and more editing on the blog.YAY LAZY DAY!!!!!!
~R
~R
HALLELUJAH!!!!!
My sport season is over!!!! I'll have a lot more time to do more things!!! Recently, I've been very stressed out and anxious because I haven't had time for anything and I'm being overworked but now that my sport is out, I'll have a lot more time for a lot nicer things.
So yeah. I still have a ton of work to do but that's some weight lifted off of my shoulders. I would quit but I really love the people in the program and since they don't have time for anything outside of practice and stuff, I' never get to see them so it's a bit of a bitter sweet moment because they're all going on to do more seasons and I'm just... working.... so it's a little sad but I'll survive!!!
I actually really don't know what to do with my life now. Is this what it's like in the normal person's life? It must be so boring not being me. So simple.
~R
I actually really don't know what to do with my life now. Is this what it's like in the normal person's life? It must be so boring not being me. So simple.
~R
Editing the Blog
So I've been trying to edit the blog and do things to make it look really cool like adding pictures and custom colors and stuff but I keep messing it up! If I change one thing, I have to change other things because I've changed a color scheme or forma or something and it turns into all of these different little details that I have to change so basically I'm customizing a whole new blog and it is TERRIBLE. Not to mention that my laptop is also about seven years old so it's super slow and doesn't have a lot of drive open. Therefore, if I want to edit a picture, I have to completely wipe my drive to save one picture and then again if I want to save anotherpicture. It's not very helpful if I need to do something. It takes me about 4 hours to edit a picture.
For instance, this picture took me about 5 hours to edit. Seems simple, just a crop, some writing, and a few filters, but it took me so long I was about to throw my computer across the room. It's not from my lack of understanding of the program. I'm perfectly competent with that, it's just that the software kept quitting on me and it took another half hour to start it back up again so not only was it difficult to get the picture into the software, the software wouldn't stay open long enough for me to edit anything and save it. So this lovely picture right here took me all day yesterday to make and put back into the blog.
Well, I was starting to edit things (add the custom back ground that's up right now) and realized that the new color scheme didn't fit the picture so I was going to take it down and replace it with a Doctor Who picture but I couldn't save the DW picture to my computer! But at that point in time, the picture was already taken down and I couldn't put it back up because my computer's throwing a tantrum and I din't have it still save to my drive. So for the past 2 hours, I've been trying to at least make things decent and put it back up which obviously isn't working. So I've given up. Oh well. I'll edit it tomorrow. I've had a gigantic amount of patience with the editing of this blog and it wasn't completely terrible (I like editing) but I'm tired, it's late, I have stuff to do tomorrow (like, proper work) and I'll just have to put it off for another time. The blog looks decent enough. Oh well. I'll do it some other time. I'll have to borrow another computer.
Anyways, you can see that it's terribly annoying. I like the new background but I don't know. I might keep it. So give me your thoughts on it!!! I might keep it or I'll convert it to something else.
~R
Well, I was starting to edit things (add the custom back ground that's up right now) and realized that the new color scheme didn't fit the picture so I was going to take it down and replace it with a Doctor Who picture but I couldn't save the DW picture to my computer! But at that point in time, the picture was already taken down and I couldn't put it back up because my computer's throwing a tantrum and I din't have it still save to my drive. So for the past 2 hours, I've been trying to at least make things decent and put it back up which obviously isn't working. So I've given up. Oh well. I'll edit it tomorrow. I've had a gigantic amount of patience with the editing of this blog and it wasn't completely terrible (I like editing) but I'm tired, it's late, I have stuff to do tomorrow (like, proper work) and I'll just have to put it off for another time. The blog looks decent enough. Oh well. I'll do it some other time. I'll have to borrow another computer.
Anyways, you can see that it's terribly annoying. I like the new background but I don't know. I might keep it. So give me your thoughts on it!!! I might keep it or I'll convert it to something else.
~R
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